Freedom vs. Fear

Fear (v): to be afraid of (someone or something) as likely to be dangerous, painful, or threatening

How many times a day do we use this word? Fear can be so crippling and suffocating, so why do we let this feeling rule our lives?  For me, fear is something that controls many of my thoughts and actions. Fear makes me question every single move I make, causing me to over think even the simplest of things. It holds us back from so much, like making changes, talking to someone new, or even being yourself...it can turn you into someone you never created to be. But isn't that what Satan wants? God gives us freedom from these thoughts and from the thief of joy, Satan. He has already given it to you, so take it. Choose to live in that freedom and grace, even if you feel like you don't deserve it. 

I have let fear control the many choices of life. I began to see opportunities as inconveniences because fear began to creep in and turned excitement into worry. Too many times in life we think about the future as scary and uncertain. And yes, it is uncertain but how amazing that we don't have to know every single detail about where we will be in the next 10 years. In Matthew 6:34 it says, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough troubles of its own". This verse has been a constant encouragement to me because as life seems to become more and more uncertain my trust in the Lord has become stronger and stronger. I am reminded that God is stronger than fear and worry, that He is not held down by these chains and He died to release me from those chains as well. So I am going to choose to live in this freedom and be drenched by His never ending waterfall of grace.

Three months ago an organization visited my church talking about their ministry in China, and for the past three months it has been on my heart and mind non-stop. But fear found its way into my mind telling me that I am not brave enough and I am not a "good" enough Christian. I got so used to hearing these lies that I started to believe them and even started to agree with them. I told myself that I didn't have the qualifications to even think about sharing the gospel. But I began to realize that like Jonah I've been on the run from my Nineveh. But no matter how hard and fast we run we will be reminded of what amazing gift we have been given, freedom and grace. So China, do I feel ready for it? Nope. Am I overjoyed? Somedays. But one thing is for sure, I might get to return to a place that has grown me into the person I am today and get to share the beautiful news about a beautiful savior. There is nothing more exciting than that!

What does fear look like? To me it looks like death, it is like a thief in the night coming to steal your joy. So today I choose joy. I choose freedom from fear! I choose to look towards the cross and run to my savior whatever the cost. I choose to get uncomfortable. I choose freedom! I choose love!